Before and After

So if you were to run into me on the street, and were to strike up a conversation about almost anything, within a short period I will probably bring up Peru.

For any non-Christians out there, and I know there are many of you, you may not understand the exact want behind missions.

Missions is meeting new people. Like a lovely gal from England who was also staying at Elim that somehow mistook me and Sadie to be room mates. This is funny because I'm still in high school, and Sadie rooms with Katie Jones.
Missions is spreading the gospel. The gospel, The Good News, the Love of Christ. That is missions.

Missions is about the people you are going to help. Whether it be to help build a house, to pray for people with aliments, to do anything you're asked to do. That is missions.

See, every year we go and stay at this place called Elim. Elim means, Oasis in Hebrew.
Elim is an orphanage. With the most beautiful children in the world. They love so much. They've been through hell and back, and they have an unshakable faith. It's the most amazing thing.

Last year when I went, I was newer in faith than I am now. I've matured a lot since then, but I went into the idea of Peru thinking that we'll be praying with people constantly. We'll be working constantly. We'll be doing good things at all times.

And this year, I knew how it would be a lot more. And it was really a lot of playing. A lot of cards, and waiting and being inactive and complaining.

I didn't like what I saw this year. And I know why I didn't like it. See, you could tell who was there for missions, and who was there for an awesome vacation.
I know when people as me about this year, there is a dramatic differences in what I'll tell them from last year. Last year, we were there more for people emotionally. This year, it was more physical.

Last year, on the first night, after we'd trudged up all five flights of stairs. After we'd had dinner, and were exhausted, but to excited to sleep, and were just hanging out in the common area, I walked into the room I shared with six other girls. I saw my friend Amanda at the open window.

Now, while Amanda is twenty-six, she looks 19. She acts her age, but looks a lot younger. And she's honestly one of my biggest mentors. I look up to her more than nearly anyone else. I can go to her for anything. She can laugh at my stupidity, we can talk hours of politics, drugs, religion, abortion and everything, and she'll never think less of me for my opinions. She loves her some Taco Bell and is always up for a midnight run with a bunch of teenagers when she's in town. I love her sincerely, and I don't think she knows how much.

I walked over, and saw how breath taking it truly was. It was dark, but there were lights every where. Lights sloping up the mountain, and people with dogs, kids playing in the street, and dogs barking and peeing in the streets. I fell in love with the city at that moment. And Amanda was leaning out the window looking at everything, and I heard before I saw that she had tears in her eyes. Amanda is funny, and joking, and you have to catch her in the right mood to be serious.
So, I asked her what was wrong.

"I have so much. My mom loves me, my friends, my church, my God. These people have nothing. And there faith is so much stronger. They love so much more." She said this, and started to cry. I smiled, my heart elated for some reason.
There were many of those types of instances when I just realized over and over again how much I loved and cared for everyone on my team.

This year, not so much. This year, I realized how much they annoyed me.

We went from nearly fourty going last year, to 17 this past year. Only eight youths. Three boys, five girls. And we were almost always split, four and three and one.

I was the one.
I tried to stand back and watch as much as I could, and just watch my fellows. I'll admit, that often I joined into the antics around me.

But what annoyed me was that the youth around me was selfish. When they could, they were where they were comfortable.

Now is the time when I'd like to insert the lyrics to the song "Hosanna" which is one of my favorites.

I see a generation
Rising up to take their place
With selfless faith
With selfless faith

I see a near revival
Stirring as we pray and seek
We're on our knees
We're on our knees

This is my prayer. Not to be a part of the cliche. Not to go on missions looking for fun. My prayer is that the generation coming up behind mine, that they would do a better job representing Christ in the purest of forms to the world than my generation has done.

ARTIST: NINA JANKOWICZ